'Snatchers': Imagine 'Juno', but with Hostile Aliens

Sara (Mary Nepi) is a teenage girl who’s determined to win back her ex-boyfriend Skyler (Austin Fryberger) by giving him her virginity. Unfortunately for her, he’s been infested with extraterrestrial matter, and impregnates her with alien spawn. She runs to her smart friend Hayley (Gabrielle Elyse), who stands by her when the quickly gestating creature pops out and immediately starts killing people.

Okay, let’s start with the fact that the extraterrestrial infestation originates in Mexico. It’s an “illegal alien.” In one scene, Sara and Hayley connect Skyler’s recent trip to the creatures: “Mexico,” they say, in an ah-ha moment. This bit of racism is poked fun at meta-ly by Sara as “a brief lapse of xenophobia,” but it’s still pretty offensive. But I also must point out the movie takes place in 2012, and the aliens are documented by the Mayans as what is going to destroy the world. So the Mexico thing is logical in that sense? The filmmakers do give us a kickass Latino cop, Officer Ruiz (Nick Gomez). Okay no, he’s pretty awesome.

*Spoiler alert* He makes it

The movie soundly indulges in stereotypes in general. Sara starts out as a snob who threw Hayley over to hang out with her catty, more popular friend Kiana (Ashley Argota) and dumb girls Blair (Amy Arburn) and Tegan (Gabriella Gourdin). She goes for help from Dave the gentle stoner (Rich Fulcher). Skyler is a typical brainless jock. Hayley is a nerd; she’s unpopular, asexual, and smart. And her brother Jerome (Alex Skinner) is the same way. Here’s a gif. It’s as cute as it is cringeworthy: https://images.app.goo.gl/eqEUKJAv7bxsjtNb6

But I really want to like this movie. It’s funny, the two female leads are strong and brave, and it’s a fresh take on the alien subgenre. Once you get past the cliches, Sara and Hayley are super likable. In fact, they’re goddamned adorable.

You just wanna squish their wittle faces!

Even the snappy, slangy patter they spout is endearing. Did I mention they kick ass?

In the end, it won me over. I recommend it.

Published by GhoulieJoe

I wuvs the horror movies and like to write snarky reviews about them. I also included some pretentious as hell microfiction (don't worry, it's at the bottom).

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