Robert Englund’s ‘976-EVIL’: A Kinda Creepy ’80s movie with Just the Right Amount of Cheese (review)

Directed by Robert Englund. Hoax (Stephen Geoffreys) is a nerdy teen whose obsessively religious mother babies him. His rebellious (but protective) cousin Spike (Patrick O’Bryan) discovers a hotline that  delivers a “horrorscope”—couplets that generally urge people to do bad things, such as when Spike is told to steal a pair of gloves he wants andContinue reading “Robert Englund’s ‘976-EVIL’: A Kinda Creepy ’80s movie with Just the Right Amount of Cheese (review)”

‘Killer Klowns from Outer Space’: ‘The Blob’, but with Clowns (review)

Mike (Grant Cramer) and Debbie (Suzanne Snyder) are two young people in love. Their evening at a make-out spot is interrupted by, as the title suggests, killer clowns from outer space. The clowns’ game is kidnapping people, wrapping them in cotton candy cocoons, and drinking their essence with a silly straw. Har dee har har.Continue reading “‘Killer Klowns from Outer Space’: ‘The Blob’, but with Clowns (review)”

‘Hellbound: Hellraiser II’: Think Outside the Box with Kirsty! (review)

The film takes place a few hours after the first movie left off (despite being released four years later). Kirsty is trapped in a mental hospital because she won’t stop raving about burning the mattress Julia died on. The evil head psychiatrist there, Dr. Channard (Kenneth Cranham), is making obsessive puzzle-solver Tiffany (Imogen Boorman) openContinue reading “‘Hellbound: Hellraiser II’: Think Outside the Box with Kirsty! (review)”

David Cronenberg’s ‘Dead Ringers’ is Brilliant and Wrenching (review)

Twin brothers Beverly and Elliot are genius boys trying to understand women and their ways. After discussing the wonders of fish intercourse (they don’t need physical contact to procreate), they ask a neighbor girl to have sex with them in their bathtub. They grow up to become famous gynecologists, ironically learning very little about women.Continue reading “David Cronenberg’s ‘Dead Ringers’ is Brilliant and Wrenching (review)”

1988’s ‘The Stay Awake’ is Entertaining and Somewhat Original (review)

The film opens with the death of Brown, murderer of eleven women, who vows revenge on his executioners. Cut to St. Mary’s School for Girls, where eight students and their den mother Miss Walton are raising money by staying awake at the school all night (hence the title). Brown decides to give them a visit,Continue reading “1988’s ‘The Stay Awake’ is Entertaining and Somewhat Original (review)”