‘Misery’: Even with the Corny Sheriff, and the Hobbling Scene Already Spoiled for You, it’s Still Pretty Intense (review)

Paul (James Caan) is a writer famous for his romance novels about a woman named Misery. After finishing his new non-Misery novel (having killed her in his newest published book), he crashes his car during a blizzard. He’s rescued by Annie (Kathy Bates), a former nurse who treats his multiple injuries in her home, claimingContinue reading “‘Misery’: Even with the Corny Sheriff, and the Hobbling Scene Already Spoiled for You, it’s Still Pretty Intense (review)”

‘Tales from the Darkside: The Movie’: Darkly Funny and Surprisingly Gory (review)

Rated R version of the ’80s TV show, divided into three segments. The wraparound story involves little Timmy (Matthew Lawrence), who’s trying to avoid being cooked for a dinner party by Betty (Deborah Harry) and is distracting her with tales. “Lot 249,” adapted from an Arthur Conan Doyle story, involves poor college student Bellingham (SteveContinue reading “‘Tales from the Darkside: The Movie’: Darkly Funny and Surprisingly Gory (review)”

‘Repossessed’: You Gotta, at Least Once (review)

It’s an early ‘90s spoof of The Exorcist. Nancy (Linda Blair) is a housewife who was once possessed as a young girl, and who becomes, as the title suggests, repossessed. Leslie Nielsen is Father Mayii, the priest who comes to her aid. Things are complicated when Ernest (Ned Beatty) and Fanny Ray Weller (Lana Schwab),Continue reading “‘Repossessed’: You Gotta, at Least Once (review)”

Clive Barker’s ‘Nightbreed’: A Bloody Fairy Tale (review)

Written and directed by Clive Barker, adapted from his story. Boone (Craig Sheffer) is a seemingly nice guy who during a therapy session with his psychiatrist Dr. Decker (David Cronenberg) finds out that while under hypnosis he confessed to killing fifteen people. Boone flees to the mythical town of Midian, where the monsters live andContinue reading “Clive Barker’s ‘Nightbreed’: A Bloody Fairy Tale (review)”

‘Night of the Living Dead’ (1990): Do it for Barbara! And Tony Todd! (review)

Remake of George A. Romero’s 1968 film, this time in color with a modern twist or two. Makeup man Tom Savini takes the director’s seat this time, with Romero writing the screenplay. It keeps the same basic plot and characters: a band of humans with higher than average survival skills board themselves up in aContinue reading “‘Night of the Living Dead’ (1990): Do it for Barbara! And Tony Todd! (review)”

‘Jacob’s Ladder’: Rich in Biblical Goodness (and Creepy as F***) (review)

Jacob (Tim Robbins) is a friendly postal worker who is also a Vietnam veteran. His fairly comfortable life with his girlfriend Jezzie (the wonderful, late Elizabeth Peña) is disrupted by sudden hallucinations: he has Vietnam flashbacks and also horrible visions of monsters. One night he wakes up in bed with his ex-wife Sarah (Patricia Kalember),Continue reading “‘Jacob’s Ladder’: Rich in Biblical Goodness (and Creepy as F***) (review)”

William Friedkin’s ‘The Guardian’: It’s Worth at Least a Perfunc-tree Glance (review)

Camilla is the world’s best nanny. She’s sweet, knowledgeable, and works weekends. Too bad she’s also a Druid priestess (it’s quite the ma-tree-archy) who tends to sacrifice her young charges to a baby-eating tree. Up-and-coming couple Phil and Kate hire her, feeling blessed that all she asks in return for her hard work is TuesdayContinue reading “William Friedkin’s ‘The Guardian’: It’s Worth at Least a Perfunc-tree Glance (review)”

‘The Exorcist III: Legion’–Not as Scary as ‘The Exorcist’ But Creepy, and At Least There’s No Pea Soup-Spewing (review)

Ignoring the second movie, The Exorcist III picks up roughly 15 years after the original left off, with Lieutenant Kinderman (George C. Scott) investigating a series of murders that appear to be the work of the Gemini Killer (Brad Dourif), who’s supposed to be dead. Meanwhile, Kinderman encounters Patient X (Jason Miller), a mental patientContinue reading “‘The Exorcist III: Legion’–Not as Scary as ‘The Exorcist’ But Creepy, and At Least There’s No Pea Soup-Spewing (review)”

‘Arachnophobia’ Stands up to the Test of Time (review)

While on a job in Venezuela, a photographer is killed by a very poisonous and very bitey new breed of spider. The little bugger happily rides home with the corpse to a small town in America. Ross (Jeff Daniels), the town’s new doctor, is unfortunately quite afraid of spiders, but now has to deal withContinue reading “‘Arachnophobia’ Stands up to the Test of Time (review)”